Out of the quarrel with others, we make rhetoric; out of the quarrel with ourselves, poetry. -- William Butler Yeats

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12.23.2003
they got me...
well, it was bound to happen. spending all my time w/two kids who have been/are at varying stages of sickness has landed me ill as well. this den of disease i call my home has given me either an ear infection or sinus infection. i have an appointment tomorrow to find out which. fun fun.

going shopping for some christmas dinner supplies tonight once the wife gets home. christmas dinner is my responsibility in the wife's family. i'm thinking of a dual main course this year. i'm going to use a red/yellow/orange pepper & shrimp theme. how this will be presented is a mystery, even to me, until about 30 minutes before christmas dinner.

can't wait to get to bama this week to see the fam. it's been awhile. they haven't seen jackson since he was about 2 or 3 months old. i am sensing a whole week of babysitting opportunities. should be fun times. thanks to the in-laws for housesitting. wonder if the place will be clean when we get back?

so, i'm rambling because both kids are currently occupied & somewhat separated. when did all the female guests start completely stripping down on stage on the springer show. during the past several days at home, while flipping through channels trying to find some kid worthy tv, i always seem to flip past springer & there has always, & i mean always, a naked woman on stage. not pretty women either. more like ones that resemble divito's protrayal of the penguin in the batman movies. quite scary.

uh oh, powerpuff girls just ended, so i suspect my moment of peace is about to end. hope everyone has a happy & safe holiday of your choice.

Comments [] || posted by Michael @ 1:54 PM || Archives || PermLink ||


12.20.2003
top 5 december search strings
mentor ohio mullet :: was there a heard of mullet looking for a home? i say welcome. we have designated an area especially for you. it is called mentor-on-the-lake, or the MOL by the locals as they zip past in their camaros.

creed chicago watch :: now that is just sad.

picture of benoit balls :: exactly how did my site come up on this search? did i mention richard gere somewhere?

the after urination shake :: i hope they are referring to the ubiquitous post-urination action of men. it's either that or the shake flavor of the month at mcdonalds.

belly button sister tickling :: ok, that's just plain sick. i don't even think i've seen my sister's belly button. give me one good, socially & morally adjusted reason someone would search on this.

Comments [] || posted by Michael @ 10:27 PM || Archives || PermLink ||

happy bday...
just wanted to wish my friend todd a very happy birthday. his site says it's today, but i could have sworn it is tomorrow. eh, either way, hope you get what you want. btw, i don't think anyone wanted to know about the physical effects of your new phone.

Comments [] || posted by Michael @ 9:05 AM || Archives || PermLink ||


12.19.2003

saddam saved hundreds w/geico

Comments [] || posted by Michael @ 6:34 PM || Archives || PermLink ||


12.18.2003
professor petri dish
things i've learned in the past week w/sick children:
  • kids will cough directly in your face w/o concern that their caregiver will get sick.

  • the new dave matthews solo CD is a sure fire way to put a baby to sleep.

  • they lose the ability to do everyday tasks, such as pulling a blanket over themselves or drinking.

  • kids can watch the same cartoon DVD over and over and over....

  • a kid who doesn't want to take medicine can suddenly develop very stong muscles, especially in the jaw.

  • lysol should come in multipacks.

  • the hand sanitizer market is actually limited in brands & hard to find in the store.

  • no matter how hard you try, how much plastic sheeting & barbed wire you use, one sick child will infect another one.

  • the degree of illness is directly proportional to the importance of the upcoming holiday & travel arrangements.


Comments [] || posted by Michael @ 10:02 AM || Archives || PermLink ||


12.17.2003
dr. atkins christmas
i can imagine this conversation in millions of households this christmas eve:

junior: 'mom, where are the cookies? i need to leave some for santa before i go to bed.'

mom: 'actually, i talked to santa yesterday & he said that he is avoiding carbs now. he suggested a nice chicken breast w/a class of water w/a lemon twist.'

Comments [] || posted by Michael @ 9:03 AM || Archives || PermLink ||


12.15.2003
let's play catch up...
week starts off w/a cracked windshield on my new 2004 car courtesy of an arrant rock on the freeway. then my daughter gets what we think is pink eye. the wife & i get our profitsharing checks. largest in the company history. find out daughter has bacterial/viral infection in throat, nose & eye. daughter develops aversion to taking medicine. i have a deadline for a new app of january 1st, but i will be on vacation for the last 2 weeks of the year so the deadline is actually 12/19 for me. i am working from home & some nights at the office to keep on track. i'd say it's been a long week here in the leaphart household. the kids are still asleep, hence the reason i can write this. i will probably have a screaming, hungry baby any minute now. i could possible have to wake my daughter to take some antibiotics. that will not be a pretty site.

so, what is going on in the world. i see the military found saddam hiding in a 6' x 4' hole in the middle of iraq. funny they can find something like that but can't seem to put their fingers on warheads, chemical weapons or anything else resembling weapons of mass destruction. did i mention there is going to be a report released this week saying no one can find any evidence of these weapons?

flu epidemic. i wonder how much of this is just media hype? we gave into the hype & got our youngest vaccinated just in case. still, i don't really know anyone who has caught it yet(knocks on the wooden desk).

gore endorses dean. is this really a good thing for howard dean? he's already in the lead. i'm not sure gore has too much weight in swinging voters any longer. it was, however, worth it to see lieberman so pissed off. like his flying monkey looking ass had a chance.

well, i hear tiny footsteps upstairs. i better bolt. until next time, just keep in mind that conservatives gave clinton hell for not being drafted. dubya leaves his post, isn't punished & wears military garb every chance he gets now. that's like the guy who tried out for the team as a punter, didn't make it & still wears the jersey he paid for himself everywhere he goes.

Comments [] || posted by Michael @ 7:55 AM || Archives || PermLink ||


12.11.2003
what else would a fake president eat...
hey, remember that super secret trip to iraq dubya took on turkey day to spend it w/the troops. the administration claimed it wasn't a photo op. he was there to boost the morale of the troops. maybe, but if they weren't expecting reporters there, why is it that he is seen here w/this turkey. the photo was used on the news wires on countless sites & newspapers. one problem. the turkey is fake. according to the washington post no one actually ate anything off this bird. the troops were served sliced turkey on side tables. no big deal you say. fine. then why didn't dubya use the actual turkey meat instead? i mean, it wasn't a photo op after all. people normally keep ornamental, dead, cooked poultry on their tables. remember this when the election gets in full swing. don't think you will not see the pseudo-landing of dubya on the aircraft carrier to declare the desert storm 2 over. they said then that we would not see the images used in advertising. i'll believe that when i don't see it. by the way, the war isn't over junior.

Comments [] || posted by Michael @ 9:21 AM || Archives || PermLink ||


12.8.2003
those mischievous guys at google are at it again...
try typing in 'miserable failure' into the google search engine. here's a link to the search for those too lazy to type.

Comments [] || posted by Michael @ 10:41 AM || Archives || PermLink ||


12.2.2003
more cleveland woes...
in her latest attempt to cut the city budget deficit, mayor jane has decided to stop cleveland's curbside recycling program and remove all trash cans from cleveland streets. this comes a week after announcing several hundred cops, firefighters & ems workers would be laid off to help the city's woeful budget. as i watched the local news on the scene in downtown talking about how the streets would soon be filled w/garbage & we would end up like detroit, dirty & crime ridden, i noticed something. as the rogue newspapers flew through the air, they passed by downtown buildings, trees & other structures lit up in christmas colors, all paid for by cleveland taxpayers. how about instead of cutting down on law enforcement and emergency services or dooming cleveland streets to resemble something from a mad maxx movie, why doesn't the mayor discontinue the lighting of terminal tower & all of downtown this year. i'm sure the mayor already thought of that & decided that the people of cleveland would be cheered up by the lights as they are fighting off intruders into their homes or putting out the burning crackhouse down the street.

Comments [] || posted by Michael @ 8:57 AM || Archives || PermLink ||


12.1.2003
World Aids Day


Comments [] || posted by Michael @ 1:50 PM || Archives || PermLink ||

an apology for dad
when my sister & i were kids, my dad told us a story of a lake or resevior near his hometown of lexington, sc. apparently, at one time there was an auto accident where a car ended up slipping off the road & sunk to the bottom of the lake. divers were sent down to retrieve the car(or things from it, i don't recall). when they found it, they were promptly chased away by a giant catfish. now, according to my dad, the divers reported a giant catfish the size of the car itself swimming in the water. this went along w/accounts of residents seeing something extremely large swimming in the lake.

my sister & i always made fun of my dad for this story. i mean, come on. a car-sized catfish?! well, apparently, i now owe my dad an apology. a story on cnn.com reports a catfish in cambodia that weighs over 600 lbs & is 10ft long. it also appears that is the average size for this type of catfish. they report that the fish were once found in southeast asia but are now very rare.

i can take the leap of faith that someone could have brought over one of the fish & set it free in the south carolina waters. who knows. either way, i just wanted to say, on behalf of michelle & i, sorry dad. sorry for the years of ridicule. now we will just have to focus on the story of the glowing read eyes in the swamp!!

Comments [] || posted by Michael @ 1:43 PM || Archives || PermLink ||

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